Director: Seth MacFarlane
Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Seth MacFarlane, Amanda Seyfried, Morgan Freeman
Distributor: Universal Pictures
Runtime: 116 mins. Reviewed in Jun 2015
| JustWatch |
Rating notes: Strong drug use, crude humour, sexual references and coarse language

The first ‘Ted’ film marked the live-action debut of writer-director-voice artist Seth MacFarlane, best known for creating the profane animated sitcom ‘Family Guy’. It was reasonably well-received, and made a hefty profit, so a sequel was naturally developed. It’s a pity then that it too often feels like it was made purely to capitalise on the goodwill of the first film – it differentiates itself from its predecessor, but just never comes together well enough or makes much sense.

John Bennett (Mark Wahlberg) was just a young Boston kid when a wish miraculously bought his stuffed bear to life. Now thirty-odd years later, John and Ted are all grown up, and have remained best friends through it all – they regularly meet up at bars or at John’s house to drink and take drugs. The ‘Care Bears’ this is not. A year after Ted is married to his girlfriend Tami-Lynn (Jessica Barth), their relationship is on the rocks. They decide to have a child together to renew their love, and after some problems with IVF treatment, they decide to adopt.

However, when their adoption application raises some red flags, Ted is officially classified as non-human by the government, and thus property. This has wider ramifications – he loses his job and his marriage is forcibly annulled. Set on winning back Ted’s civil rights, John and Ted employ junior lawyer Samantha Leslie Jackson – Sam L. Jackson, geddit? – (Amanda Seyfried) to help them sue the government. Though there are some attempts to wax lyrical on the essence of humanity, any philosophical musings take a backseat to the constant silly jokes which treat any minority or taboo as a potential target.

As with MacFarlane’s last film, ‘A Million Ways To Die In The West’, the problem can be narrowed down largely to the script. The best jokes aren’t well integrated into the narrative, and are serviced by cutaways with little relevance to whatever else is going on. Accusations of racist and sexist humour would be well-founded, and these gags do little but test the boundaries of good taste. It has smartly avoided the comedy sequel trap of retelling the same story (a la ‘The Hangover’) by focusing instead on a legal battle, but even this central plot never feels like the true focus. Add in an unnecessary subplot about Hasbro’s plan to kidnap and dissect Ted to create new toy lines, and it’s both overlong and ill-advised.

It’s a fairly high budget operation, and the craft on display cannot be faulted. The special effects used to bring Ted to life as a photo-real talking toy are impressive, it shows occasional flashes of visual inventiveness from cinematographer Michael Barrett, and the opening titles are set over one of the most lavish and impressively choreographed dance scenes I have seen in a contemporary picture. The cast are so-so, though Amanda Seyfried steals a scene or two playing against type as a drug-dabbling, pop-culture illiterate legal eagle.

Anyone who sat through the first film and wished that there was more will be no doubt pleased. No one else need apply.


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